My confinement was been a week and a half now. Seems very long.
2 days ago I was wondering how I will be able to survive 3 more weeks.
It's not really about Caylee. One main thing I am so thankful to God is that Caylee has had no signs of jaundice to date. Unlike Christopher who even had yellow in his eyes and slightly at the chest. And had to go in to the hospital at the wee hours of the morning for a test. And the pain I felt as a first time mum to see them prick him while he was crying pitifully.
It's not really about Caylee actually. She eats well though pukes up any water we give her. So, it's actually GREAT that I am able to express quite alot of BM. At least Bm has some level of water content. And in fact I now know what it means to have leakage, dripping and wear breast pads. I am really thankful to God for making up and meeting Caylee's needs that way.
But it's about the not able to bathe often. It's especially hard since I have to also entertain Christopher when he comes back from school. And weekends are harder especially if my mum is too tired to go out.
It's also about my mum who is having knee pains if she exerts herself too much. And I can't really help her....
It's also about hubby who is working this weekend even and have been working late nights. I understand his having to work coz it's budget time for his office. But it gets really hard without an extra hand.
It's also about my dad who is beginning to miss his life in Ipoh. Yet he has functions far and in between in KL which makes my mum feel it's just easier to stay put in KL instead of moving up and down.
It's also hard that Christopher is not taking to the baby as well as we would like. He gets very sensitive if we get overly protective of the baby when he tries to hold (sometimes pull) her hand or when he plays his guitar over her head!
Christopher is also missing his outing time with mummy and daddy. And always asks why mummy has to stay at home.
Sometimes the fact that I have to express BM also gets annoying coz I have to do it in a quiet corner which means leaving a sometimes throwing tantrum kid with my pain-wrecked mum.
I can't wait for this 3 more weeks to be over so that I can help around more with the stuff that needs to be done. Why or why does it have to be 30 days! I so hope my mum doesn't extend it to 40 days since that is the duration she will be here anyway!!!
Then again....when my parents go back to Ipoh.....I am wondering if I can cope with 2 demanding kids. Especially if hubby has to work late.
One day at a time......breathe.....one day at a time.